Mrs. J was an 83 year old woman who was alone after the death of her husband; he had been her primary care giver. Physically healthy, Mrs. J had significant problems with her memory and could not manage her household or her care without her husband's assistance. Her children, who lived out of state, were eager to move her from her home.
ElderCare Solutions was contacted by the family to help with the transition to move closer to Mrs. J's daughter. They were understandably concerned about their mother and wanted to make the move immediately. ElderCare Solutions counseled them to give their mother some time to grieve her husband's death before having another life changing event. While Mrs. J had dementia, she had not lost contact with her feelings and was grieving the loss of her husband of more than 40 years. ElderCare Solutions offered guidance on how to help Mrs. J cope with the loss of her husband and the impending loss of her home and community. The importance of acknowledging her losses was stressed. She needed to creat a sense of closure to the life she shared with her husband in their home.
ElderCare Solutions found and supervised caregivers for Mrs. J in her home as an interim measure. Her large support network was contacted to ensure she had support during the initial weeks and months after her husband's death and a good-bye gathering was organized so that she could make her good-byes to the many friends she and her husband had during their lifetime in their neighborhood and community.
ElderCare Solutions helped the family find a care facility that would be
able to meet her current and future needs. The family was consulted about
the changes, both physical and emotional, that might occur with the move.
ElderCare explained that transient periods of confusion might be expected
and that Mrs. J might seem more impaired than she actually was, until she
could become oriented to and comfortable in her new home.
Three months after her husband's death, Mrs. J was successfully moved a care
facility near her daughter, who could watch over her.
Kathleen O’Laughlin, RN, MS, JD, is a cofounder of ElderCare Solutions,
Inc.